The first in a series of true scenarios presented in mediation. Reasonable? Unreasonable? Does it matter either way?
Chris and Sam have separated. Chris (Mum) lives with the children (aged 4 and 5) who see Sam (Dad) at weekends.
Chris: We agreed the arrangements for the children. He sees them at weekends and speaks to them by phone one evening during the week but he doesn’t think that is enough.
Sam: I get to see my children for a few hours at weekends. It feels very false. I have to take them to my sister’s house as they can’t come to the place I’m staying. I really miss them during the week. I used to be there for bedtimes every evening.
Chris: I’m not inclined to increase the contact because frankly he is acting very strangely and stalking us.
Sam: I drive past the house on the way home from work. I used to be there every evening for bedtimes and I’m just desperate to see them. I park across the road sometimes just to catch a glimpse of the children. It is all I have.
Chris: I sometimes look out of the window and see him watching the house, just staring. I now have to close the curtains to feel safe and also because I don’t want the children to see him and get upset.
Sam: Sometimes she looks out the window and then goes around the house closing all the curtains. It feels like I’m being cut out of their lives. I just sit there not knowing what to do.
Chris: I’ve been told I should report him to the police for harassment. I haven’t done that because I don’t want to cause trouble for him as he is the kids’ Dad but if it continues I’ll have no choice.
Sam: It makes me feel closer to them just being there, outside. I feel I’m still part of my kids’ life.
Have you been in this position or do you know someone who has?
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